I really, really, really loved the hollow crown. Really. Really really really. But.
I…had issues with this scene, several and varied.
1. Well, her English has improved… I guess that tends to happen, though I’m unsure whether her nurse would have been a very good teacher, based on the evidence we have (see: fangres, sin.)
2. Is there a little bit of, um…
Well. To paraphrase. “Hey! I just met you, and this is crazy…but I pwned your dad, so, have my babies.”
But, emphasis on the JUST MET bit. WHY ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH HER YOU NEVER MET HER BEFORE THAT IS CRAZY HARRY
Also, “Tell me what compliments I may pay you so I can convince you that I love you” definitely would not work on me. Pay me some compliments that are true and complimentary! Hint: you will probably have to know me for more than ten seconds in order to know what to say.
3. Okay, the awkward is sorta cute, I gotta admit.
4. “(could you love a man whose) face is not worth sunburning(?)”
I mean, I know that apparently the real Henry V had some huge scar on his face but if his ugly face was so important to the plot then you have cast the wrong man, BBC, or have failed to take advantage of this thing called makeup, because Tom Hiddleston is gorgeous and everyone knows it. I mean…well, that’s part of the appeal, to be honest.
It makes him seem like he’s got some kind of weird false modesty going on here, and I for one start to feel my sleazebag-radar go off. Like, really, you think if you’re a pretty guy and you tell me you’re ugly, that’ll make me like you more? No, this means you’re either a liar (and a bad one) or you have a really bad case of insecurity/body dysmorphia.
5. “I don’t hate France, I love it! That’s why I destroyed its countryside and killed thousands of your kinsmen and countrymen! I always destroy what I covet.”
Again…NOT SO REASSURING.
6. agh, bad french also really adorable…
7. AGAIN WITH THE FACE YOUR FACE IS NOT UGLY HENRY
Apparently in the 15th century they had very different ideas of male beauty.
8. …okay and the kissing bit is pretty cute, too.
9. aww, poor french daddy king. He looks kinda sad his daughter is going to England.
Wait. How old is this girl, exactly? 18? Well…okay, that’s better than Juliet, at least.
So, yeah. I get the feeling he “loves” her more for her beauty than anything else. Or maybe a little bit for the alliance factor, which I hear is a thing in monarchies, though since your son was crazy, Henry V, maybe you guys should think that through more carefully. Also. SERIOUSLY LOOK IN A MIRROR HENRY YOUR FACE.